Just Breathe

Life is so hectic. There is always so much to do. I find myself making my to do list in my head as I go to bed. Ticking everything over, should I do my ride then or should I wait until then? If Ithis will I have time to do this. I need to have done x, y and z by now and I should have done all thso Ill need to do that tomorrow as well. Not only is all this going around in my head but so much more crap its impossible to even keep track of it all. The filing mans gone on strike. There is paper overflowing out of all the cabinets. The printer is working over time. In short my brain is a mess. You wade through the paper on the floor to try and find a piece of information to find it hasnt been put into the corrct file - oh yeah the filing mans on strike- and in all likely hood it was that piece of paper thats half soaked in last weeks coffee dregs torn up and stuffed poking out from somewhere under the table. Argh.

Does this remind you of what your mind feels like sometimes? No wonder I struggle to sleep. There is just tooo much happening.
I went to see a naturopath and she gave me some suggestions for sleep. The whole sleep hygiene thing which I struggle with - ya know not using your bed for anything but sleep go to bed at the same time wake up at the same time etc etc. Well for starters I flat and my bedroom is somewhat of a reinactment of my mind. The only really clear space is the bed and 2nd I got sick so have been spending a lot of timein bed. However there was one thing she suggested which even in sickness yeah i thought i could give it a go.

Ive been noticing the fact that i eally struggle to breath lately. For an athlete not so great. Sometimes i just forget to breath and so ill come to the top of the hill and be gasping. Other times it just seems like i never get enough air. So ive been thinking about teaching myself to breath. Haha seems silly but yeah. So i started off lying on my bed just belly breathing. Noce and slow in and out tummy up chest still. You know the drill. cue major panic attack. I felt like i was suffocating. I wasnt getting enough air. Its like the air was being lost somwhere in the journey. Now logically (im a physiologist of sorts) i know this is stupi but hy logic and panic are rather different things.

So the naturopath suggested I watch some you tube videos that she gave me on learning to breath through my nose. Well i did a bit of searching on breathing exercises and came across pranayama. So each night before I go to bed i look up a pranayama breathing routine and go through it with the video on you tube. For me having something to focus on ie the instructions and the specific breathing pattern has helped me enormously to get to that state of mindfulness. Just being in the moment. I often struggle with the breathing exercises we do for the mindfulness tasks in group i feel myself panicing, my chest closing in on me and then my mind wanders but actually focusing on a rhythm a pattern of breathing i find myself just disolving into the breathing. All that exists is the voice on the video and me in my breath. Existing in my breath. Its calming and relaxing. FOr that sapce in time my mind slows down. And there is just one thing happening - just breathe!!

This is my favourite so far http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AtTyad-Vh0